I’m a virgo; therefore by nature I am bit of a perfectionist and a tad critical. I know this about myself and I am aware of the positives and negatives associated with those two character traits. Another thing to note about me as you continue reading this post is that I am a very self-aware. I have taken a number of typology tests including True Colors, Myers Brigs, and Strengthsquest with the intent of developing a better understanding of who I am. Through these assessments I have learned about my strengths, my areas of improvement, and I have developed a better understanding of how to work to become a better me.
You have heard many of times that no one is perfect and by now it just seems like a cliché; however we all have flaws and as I have matured I have learned how to accept the notion that I am not perfect and there are areas that I still need to work on.
Being in a profession that requires a lot of collaboration, teamwork, group dialogue, and self- disclosure can be challenging for an individual that is very focused on being as close to perfect as possible. I hold my cards fairly close and it takes me awhile to self-disclose and be open to others. I must admit I am a tad bit selective with my trust, but rightfully so.
Professional evaluations, feedback processes, and assessments are essential for the success of our departments but also our growth as professionals. I value constructive feedback because I know that it is an opportunity for me to grow; however what happens when you receive a nugget of feedback or criticism that you feel is not an accurate representation of you or your work? How do you move forward from that feedback?
1: Move past your personal feelings toward the feedback. No one wants their flaws to be exposed; however you must not allow the feedback to impact you personally. It is important that you allow the personal feelings towards the feedback to be separated from the professional feedback in order to move forward. If you neglect to follow this step, you will restrict your ability to grow through this process.
2: Seek Guidance from someone you trust who can relate to you personally and professionally but that does not have a direct link to the source of the feedback. When I had to personally deal with a situation similar to this I picked up the telephone and contacted my GLACUHO mentor, Ann Marie Klotz. I shared with her my concerns and listened to her wisdom and guidance. She shared two things with me that continue to have an impact on me months later.
The first thing she shared was the notion that “Perception is Reality” It is very important that you analyze the feedback from all angles. Is there any way that what is being said is true or can be perceived as true? Remember that oftentimes individuals you work with do not know you in the same context as friends and family; therefore your personality traits can be misread and misinterpreted by others. I challenge you during this process to re-evaluate your actions and relationships and become more conscious of how others perceive you. Try to develop better relationships with all your colleagues so that they gain a deeper understanding of who you are and you can gain that same understanding of them.
The second thing she shared with me was that sometimes you have to set some feedback you receive to the side. Does that mean you completely ignore it? No. It just means that you do not allow yourself to become overly worked up on something you cannot meaningfully process, reflect upon, and change. If you have the opportunity to talk to the source of the feedback that would be a great step in gaining more perspective, but if not, it may be best to file that feedback away for a while and come back to it at a later date.
As we enter into the formal Mid-Year Feedback process, I hope that these tidbits of wisdom are beneficial for you. Remember that feedback is an essential part of our profession; no one is perfect and we all have flaws. Not all feedback that you receive will be easy to hear. You may need to swallow your pride and accept it, and you might need to reach out for support and guidance in order to move forward. You may even need to seek out the source of the feedback to gain better understanding and at times you might just need to file the feedback away and come back to it at a later date. Growth and development is a process that we will never be able to get away from. Embrace feedback and allow it to be your motivation to grow.
Here is a fun quote to get you excited about the Feedback process:
“Feedback is the breakfast of champions.”
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Tuesday, December 13, 2011
Thursday, December 8, 2011
"One of the major obstacles for women who want to break through the glass ceiling is the lack of opportunity to gain wisdom and understanding from those who have already done it"
Share your story.
I tweeted this the other day and the source from where I received the inspiration for this quote has escaped me; however it still rings true. Many times we as women fail to share our story to prevent feeling embarrassed or appearing vulnerable. What we fail to realize is that our story may be just what someone needs to hear in order to be encouraged.
This topic area has been one that I have struggled with for many years. Many people are unaware of the challenges that I have faced throughout my life, and that I continue to go through because I have kept those stories locked away. As I have matured, I have begun to unlock the hidden stories of my life and share them with those around me and what I have found is that it is my life stories that have given strength to others in my life.
Another reason why this topic area has been a large reflection piece for me is because I have constantly been thinking about my personal and professional brand. My stories and the sum of my experiences have a major impact on my brand. I cannot have a clear image of my brand and present that to the world, if I do not have a clear idea of who I am and what my life story is.
I challenge you all to begin writing your story. Remember that it is your story that makes you unique; it is your story that makes you who you are. Your story is fluid and will constantly change. Your story will resonate with individuals because it is genuine and authentic to you. Oftentimes we fear sharing our story because we do not feel it will be accepted. “Why would someone want to hear about little ol’ me?”, but what you must understand is that your story is authentic to you…and authenticity resonates with people.
The Beginning Stages:
So how do you begin to write your story?
Start by writing down the most important lessons that you have learned throughout your life and the experiences that taught you those life lessons.
How do you begin to develop the courage to share your story?
Start with the people around you. Allow someone close to you to read your most important life lessons and ask them to tell you what they learned from them. This will help you to continue to develop your story. Eventually you will begin sharing with more and more people and you will see the reward that comes from being an inspiration.
Feel free to follow me on twitter @BDeniseCole